12.29.2010

Picard Flute Solo



"When I awoke, all that was left of my life there...was the flute I'd taught myself to play."

As you read this blog, your ears are probably listening to one of the most beautiful flute compositions ever made: Picard Flute Solo. If not, choose the first song on my playlist to the right and click play. It is a beautiful tune that tugs at the heart and soul. It was composed for the Star Trek TNG episode, The Inner Light. And so, why am I writing about Star Trek and this flute music? Not sure, just had some thoughts about that episode and our infinitesimal and flitting time in this vastly infinite universe.

If you haven’t seen the episode, Captain Picard is probed and his consciousness is taken to a planet where he lives for 30 years as a man with a wife and kids. Meanwhile, back at the ship, actual elapsed time is only 25 minutes. But in the 30 years he lived in the planet, he learned to play the flute, as well as experience a life that does not exist when he finally wakes up.

Thirty years, a third of a lifetime, gone without a trace except for a flute, a haunting music, and memories than no one else can share. And here I am, with 40 years of life that seemingly just flew by in a blink of an eye. And like Picard, I am left wondering, where has the time gone? What souvenirs do I have just to prove I lived those 40 years? And have I actually lived?

It has been almost two years since I last wrote on this blog. In two years, I started a new hospital job, traveled to the other side of the world three times, my father died, and I delivered another daughter to my growing family. So much change in what seems like a short amount of time. And every minute that goes by I wish for a machine that could slow everything down. I wish to somehow hold a precious second in my hand and freeze it, to make it last longer before it disappears forever. Time can be a cruel thing, whether it be years or seconds, it can never be enough even when it seems too much.

This life of mine, 40 spectral years of joy and sorrow, has been full. I hope to never wake-up and realize it was all just a dream.

the zen warriors